Wednesday, January 11, 2012

I'm So Sorry...

Those words... I'm so sick of those words.

I know there's not much a person can say after they've discovered you lost someone very close to you... But I'm just so sick of hearing that phrase.

On January 1st at about noon my cousin Kristen was admitted to Wheaton Fransiscan Medical Center[formerly known as St. Mary's Hospital] complaining of severe pain in her abdomen and groin area. She had an alarmingly low blood pressure and oxygen saturation. A few hours later they see a sore on her thigh and a "bruise" around it...

Turns out it was Necrotising Fasciitis, which is a Flesh Eating Bacteria. Kris was admitted to surgery to remove the infected skin- basically everything on her upper thighs, to about her belly button was taken. After that she was put into a medically induced coma, from which she never woke up.

My mother and our family and all Kris' close friends waited in the ICU Waiting Room and in her room taking turns talking to her. Around 7pm on January 2nd we recieved word that nothing was helping and that she was just getting worse. At this point Life support was the only thing keeping her going.

We had two choices... Hang on and see if a miracle happened, or take her off life support. It was decided we would call a priest for Last Rites and "pull the plug".

Around 8pm the priests arrived and performed Last Rites. She was taken off life support about a half hour later.

She passed away at 10:22pm, listening to Sugarland and Bon Jovi.

I lost my best friend and second mother...

Kris was the liveliest 40 year old I'd ever known. She never did anything small, either. She had a large garden, drove a truck, came over to mine and my mother's house and put in a garden in our yard, played with our rottie, Hunter. So leave it to Kris to go out in a big way... A rare flesh eating bacteria that kills 1-in-4 people. I guess she was number 4. >.< Which makes sense. Because my family has known three, now four people who've had the same thing... three lived.

We had a catholic Mass for her and then the mourners went to Infusino's to have a kickass party- just how she'd wanted it. That night she was cremated and her urn is a cute plant pot- it's blue and like... a yellow goldy type color.

I said it when Hunter died, and I'll say it again:

Pain doesn't heal all wounds. It merely masks the pain.

A week later and it's still painfully hard to realize it was actually Kris who died. I keep wanting to wake up from this horrible nightmare. I keep thinking of things I would talk to her about and I keep thinking things like "I wonder how Woofdorf's training classes are. I'll text Kris and ask."... but then I realize she'll never get the message.

The only things that makes this all feel better?

Hunter finally has the company of someone that he actually knew in life...
and Uncle John[her father who died in 2002] and Kris can finally go hunting together.

Why did it have to be Kris and not someone else?

She wouldn't have wanted us to be so torn up about her death. Hell she wouldn't have wanted a Mass...

There are a few things I want you guys to get out of this I suppose...

One: Funerals are for the survivors. Yes, make your wishes known as to what you want done with your body. What readings do you want? Do you even want any readings? What kind of music do you want? Things like that. But ultimately, it's about what will help your survivors feel some sort of closure.

As morbid as this sounds, I have written everything down that I want right down to the Purple Casket and Corset that I want to be buried in, in a notebook for my mother should I die before her. It's loosely written though, so she can plan for her own closure.

I think after this whole situation, I'm going to go back and tweak a few tings in my little Notebook. I may be Wiccan... but I found such HUGE comfort in the Last Rites that I'm gonna ask that a Catholic Priest be called... Or atleast have someone say a few Hail Mary's and Lords' Prayers over me. Hell if my Uncle Joe is still alive when I die, I actually want him to be the one to lead the prayer's.

Two: Make every day count. Live it like your last. Love as hard as you can. Live without regrets, because you're never guaranteed tomorrow.


Three: There is no wrong way to grieve... Everyone grieves in their own way... But don't bottle it up, it isn't healthy to bottle up that strong of an emotion.


Four: If you don't have a Power of Attorney, get one. It is honestly one of thee most important documents you will ever fill out. If you dont know what a power of attorney is, it's a document that states the names of the two people you want to call the shots on your medical situation should you be incapacitated/unable to state what you want done. It's not something that should be taken lightly, at all. My power of Attorney[s] are my mom, and my bestfriend, Richelle. They know that should I be in a vegetative state [brain dead]/ in a coma and there is no chance that I will recover and still be "Anna" mentally, they are to pull the plug and let me go...


Bottom line though? Don't be afraid to open up a dialogue with whoever will listen- and I do mean LISTEN about death. It shouldn't be a Taboo subject. And shame on whoever put such a huge taboo on it. It is a normal part of the cycle of life.



Thanks for listening...

Love always,

Anna

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

New Hair!

So back when I started this WHOLE blogging venture... My first post was about hair styles and my inability to settle on a style.

Then a couple weeks ago I talked about getting something like the Film version of Narciassa Malfoy.

Well I finally bit the bullet and changed it up. And it's nothing like that.





Okay so there it is! Two pictures with my hair down and styled, and two pictures with it up and ready for work. What do you guys think? I've gotten some pretty stellar reviews about it.

Just so you know, yes. The back is supposed to be like that.

My bangs are still a little on the light side, I think in terms of weight. So when I go back to David [Over at Master Cuts at Regency Mall here in Racine] I'm going to ask him to add a bit of weight to them. Stupid whacky Cowlicks making my bangs lay all stupid.

Leave me a comment, let me know what you think. :)

Love,
Anna

P.S.

YAY! Tri-color hair!!!

FOTD: Fresh Work Face

Well... Fresh for me, anyways. XD




Iiii dunno why my hand is ALWAYS in my hair. >.> Sorry. v.v

But this was the last day I had completely red hair- that's right! You heard me! I got rid of it. [that's going to be another blog though.]


This look is surprisingly toned down and mellow for me when I'm going to work. I actually got asked if I was feeling well by a coworker because of the toned down makeup. LMAO!

Now I want to talk about my contouring. I'm super in love with using Covergirl's face powder in 555 Soft Honey because it gives me a more subtle contour and over all cheek, allowing me to have a more cut cheekbone, while still focusing attention on either my eyes [like usual] or my lips [which I rarely do. Because then I feel like a clown], without making it look like I've got way too much going on. :)

My list of products used is basically the same as always, though. :( I've really gotta switch it up soon or y'all are going to get bored with me. XD

Love you guys!
Anna

I'm just feelin' a liiiittle lazy...





So this is the Lady Sloth. :] She's a little more subtle than I thought she was going to be. She's a bit of a cut crease with a super dusty looking blue on the lid, black cutting the crease, and a dark silvery blending it out. She turned out... more smokey and pretty than I had originally planned.

Products:

- Coastal Scents Matte Eye Primer
- 88 Original Palette from Coastal Scents
- Eyeliner is the usual Maybelline Gel liner [which I don't have anywhere near me. So I can't give you an actual name... Because Drugstore Brand names are always SO long...] in Blackest Black and Charcoal [which is a Gunmetal metallicy grey]
- Random Falsies from eBay.
- Hard Candy's Face Primer
- Clean Liquid Foundation in 205 Ivory by Covergirl
- Setting powder is 505 Classic Ivory by Covergirl
- Contour along my cheeks is 555 Soft Honey by Covergirl
- To add a dewy glow back to the skin, I used a variety of products:
- Hard Candy's Baked Blush in Honeymoon
- Elf's Bronzer in Illuminate
On my lips:
- ELF Essentials Lipstick in Nostalgic
- Milani Crystal Gloss for lips in Secret

So that's Sloth! Get back to me on how you guys like it! I have big, BIG plans for the next three looks. I'm not looking forward to Pride yet because I don't have too much of an idea yet on what I'm doing for her. Everyone's saying "do a rainbow" but... EVERYONE has done rainbows. It'll come to me. I'm sure. ^_^

Love,
Anna

Coming Soon!

Coming soon to the blog:

A Co-op with one of my photographer friends- she has her own blog here on Blogger:

www.richellesbloggityforphotography.blogspot.com

I also have a haul that I swear I'm *going* to do. I just want to show you guys what I just bought. Because EVERY time I tell y'all I've just bought something and I'm super excited about it... I just lose the motivation. I will not lie. But I'm freakin' determined.

I have to get out of this funk that I've fallen into ever since Hunter died.

So!

What did I get? Well, I was going to do a major ELF haul, but the Sale I was going to take advantage of ran out about two hours before I got home from shopping for a sweater. v.v Not a big deal. I still plan on checking them out on Black Friday and Cyber Monday.

Now we all know me and my love of Coastal Scents. >.> And they were running a sale I could NOT pass up! It was 40% off all Makeup items.

So here's a list of what I got:

88 Prism Palette
88 Mirage Palette
Light Camo Quad
24 Karat Gold (sample Size)
Bronze (Sample Size)

The two sample size items, in case you didn't know, are like... pigments. They're going to be metallic. I was thinking of getting some Tinsel. But I already have some of that and I have yet to use it! XD But I know exactly where I'm going to use it.

Buuut yeah! Two 88 palettes, hm? I was feeling the need for COLOR! <.< And I've been looking for some awesome warm colors lately- even though we're heading into Winter here pretty soon and I basically switch my warm fall color routine over to cool toned winter colors riiight after Thanksgiving. But we'll go further into depth about that in the next day or two.

Now you're probably thinkin', "But Anna, if you were looking for warm colors, why didn't you just buy the 'warm palette' as opposed to two different palettes?"

<.< Simple answer: I didn't like how neutral and natural it looks. You guys know me. Natural is not how I role.

I think next on my hit parade in terms of palettes is probably going to be the Metal Mania palette. ^_^

Anyways! I'm off to go work on another blog post or two for you guys! I have a Sin and a few FOTDs.

Love,
Anna!

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

11 Holes, Modern Image Body Mod review, and FOTD

I'm talkin' piercings! Yesterday, I got my [technically] 11th piercing.

For the past three years I've been pining for a Conch piercing, and I was finally able to get it. It's not like it's super expensive... it's just I've kind of been afraid of the pain that comes with it. But I tell you what, those fears were unfounded.

I went to Modern Image Body Modification, on High Street and Douglas Avenue, here in Racine. I love this place! They're helpful and supportive if you're feeling a bit scared about whatever you're getting done.

They do everything from Jacob's Ladders to your basic lobe piercing!

My two friends, AJ and Sammie and myself walked in[no appointment needed] at about 6pm, filled out the paperwork [Liability waver] and then the piercer filled out what he needed to, checked our IDs [you *need* your ID.] and took us into the back where the piercing room was.

AJ went first and got his tongue pierced. Sammie started feeling some nerves and wanted me to go next, so I sat on the little bed thing- like in a doctor's room, and he measured out my ear and made sure he had jewelry the right size and such, dotted where he was aiming, had me lay back and his words were "Lay back, and look away from the bad man causing you pain." Next thing you know it's "take a nice deep breath... alright. Let it out." and by the time my breath was out, the needle was through my ear, and the jewelry was in- talk about fast. Then we finally talked sammie back into getting her piercing- she was getting her tongue done as well.

The only downside to this whole experience was that the needle knicked right behind my ear [oddly that's what hurts the most. >.<] and Sammie nearly passed out. My gripe though? My whole ear is sore. Like I got a helix [upper cartilage] piercing... I didn't. Obviously.

Anyway, it would appear that most of their piercings are $25 :] They're well worth it!

I give Modern Image Body Modification 4.5 stars! ^_^ If you're in the area go check 'em out.



Alright! Aaaand I have a really pretty FOTD!




Iii'm basically in love with this style of makeup. the gold is like a highlight in the center of the eyelid! It's so pretty. It kind of makes any eyeshadow you're wearing look like it has a duo-chrome in it.

So! That's got that for this post. More looks coming at some point here.

I'm sorry for the extended abscence, lovelies.

Toodles for now!

Love,
Anna

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Just an update!

Okay so I seem to do better when my mom is around. I'm not so depressed... So I figured I'd do a fun update while she's across the room, and we watch The A-List: Dallas.

Iiii just took advantage of an AMAZING E.L.F sale! I have neeever tried annny E.L.F [Eyes. Lips. Face] products... and I kind of went a littttle nuts. Sort of.

And by sort of nuts I mean nine products! XD

Two Brushes- One small angle, one concealer.
Two Concealers- One in Apricot Beige (fair), one in Ivory.
One Bronzer- Essential Healthy Glow Bronzing Powder in Luminance.
Four Lipsticks- One in Captivating, one in Charming, one in Nostalgic, and finally one in Seductive.

A little retail therepy never hurt, right? Lol... well that's probably not true, but I feel a bit better now.

In other news! I have decided that too many people have my hair coloring- Red and Black two-toned hair. I'm starting to look... normal. Like nothing special to look at.

My lovelies, I have decided that I'm changing my hair style and color :). Want to see to what?

Ladies and Gentleman, may I introduce Narcissa Malfoy?




I have had suuch a huge hair crush on this woman ever since I saw her in the movie. In. Love. YESS.

I'm going to keep the length on my hair, because when my hair is that short [I've had it WAY shorter. Promise] it tends to flip out at te end. Just going to get it trimmed up into healthy hair and have Dee Dee work out the colors. I am going to have the blonde part white-ish and hopefully have like a dark chocolatey color.

So. Excited.

In more news... I really. Really. Really. Want to go to Michael's and pick up some Sculpey and Sculpey Glaze and just start making cut little charms.

I know the first like... four projects I'm going to do.

Rottweiler necklace/earings/Jewelry set
Lolipop necklace/earings/jewelry set.
Cupcake Earings.
Mini and Mickey earings. ^_^

I miss having a hobbey- that doesn't revolve around makeup.

aaand I think one final thing:

I'm getting a tattoo within the next year of my dog. I'm going to put it on my left upper arm. I haven't worked the whole thing out in my head yet, but I have a basic idea.

I miss that goddamn dog.

Anyways I think that's it for now. ^.^

Love,
Anna.